Why are boys underperforming in school?

This is a story about two seemingly disconnected lives. Isaiah and Lynnsee’s paths briefly merged on a preschool playground in Arkansas about 15 years ago. Their convergence illustrates subtle features of the modern education system that have catalyzed a growing achievement gap between boys and girls. A female-oriented approach to education is so intuitive we can overlook how it unintentionally dismisses the biological needs of young boys. But parents, teachers, and school leaders can’t ignore these needs. The consequences are bad for boys, bad for men, and bad for the women who love them.

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My car reeks with an odor that is familiar, but unpleasant. It’s the smell of sweat, body odor, and the fast food burgers the 16-year-old boys in my car are eating to refuel between basketball games at an all-day tournament. Isaiah, the young man who managed to secure the front seat of the car, is no stranger to me. I’ve known him since he was a preschooler.

“Jack!” he yells, “Over or under four bites?” as he holds the burger above his head making it visible to the guys in the back. I hardly understand the question. Jack responds exuberantly “Under!” That is all the encouragement Isaiah needs to take as few gigantic bites as possible to get the entire burger in his mouth. If he gets the burger in his mouth in under four, he wins. There is no actual prize. Just the reward of a pointless challenge accepted and conquered. Everyone in the car has gone wild. They are either cheering or attempting to eat an entire half-pound of hamburger in less than four bites. The testosterone level in my car is excessive. Inhibition is absent. All that remains is a near-constant vying for dominance. It will be an olfactorily challenging but adventurous weekend.

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I met Lynnsee about 15 years ago when I opened my first preschool facility. It’s the preschool that Isaiah attended. I had only seen her name in the signature line of emails we sent back and forth to coordinate a time for her to inspect our facility before opening. I was surprised by her age when we met. Her youthful name seemed like it should be attached to a much younger woman. Her husband–who I later learned was an active engineer. She retired from teaching a few years before. She had too much energy for an empty house. So she became a part-time preschool licensing specialist. But Lynnsee never did anything half-hearted. The badge pinned to her blouse read “Head Licensing Specialist”. Her full-time job was to inspect preschool facilities and playgrounds for safety and quality.

Boys and Academic Achievement

Around the time I met Lynnsee, the world was beginning to murmur about male achievement issues. In many ways, it was taboo to talk about the challenges young men faced. This was the era of girl power. By academic measures, the girls are doing fine now. But in the last fifteen years, stats have only gotten worse for boys.

The achievement gap between boys and girls starts before Kindergarten. It persists throughout every level of education. That gender achievement gap is larger than any other racial or economic achievement gap¹.

Many parts of the male brain mature later than little girls. This accounts for some of the disparity between boys and girls. But even once boys reach similar levels of achievement, they still don’t perform as well in school. Girls will get higher grades on their report cards throughout their schooling. Boys are more likely to be tagged with a behavioral or cognitive disability. They are less likely to read on time, graduate from high school, or enroll in college.

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The Male Brain and Biology

Isaiah is what some might describe as an “alpha boy”. His strength garners attention on the playground. When he and the other boys engage in a foot race, he usually wins. He basks in a sense of dominance when it’s his turn to be the line leader. His block tower has to be the tallest.

The propensity toward superlatives–fastest, strongest, highest, best–needs calming before he gets much older. But he’s a preschool boy. There are a lot of social and biological factors encouraging this impulse for greatness.

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Overall, male and female brains are quite similar. But there are a few important differences. These differences impact how they relate to people and objects, as well as what secures their respective attention and motivation. It’s tempting to believe this variance is a byproduct of their social environments. But the differences start long before social constructs influence their development.

In the Womb

Around eight-weeks in utero, girls’ and boys’ brains begin to develop differently. At that time, a testosterone surge kills off some of the cells in a male’s communication center and he grows extra cells in his sex and aggression centers. The fetal brain of girls will develop more connections in the areas that process communication and emotion.² A baby boy will be less interested in emotional expression and less drawn to faces and differences in vocal tones than baby girls. Boys will likely be more interested in objects and in chasing them. On average boys are more action-oriented.²

The First Year of Life

In his first year of life, a boy’s brain is “marinated in testosterone” according to Dr. Louann Brizendine. As a result of this and another hormone (MIS) boys will have large muscles, better fine motor skills, and (on average) engage in more aggressive and exploratory types of play. Given a choice, boys will spend their free time in competitive play. And that competition will likely be linked to physical strength and activity.² Boys and girls both undergo a period of hormonal calm that starts around their first year of life and extends to puberty called the juvenile pause. Things really shake up once puberty hits.

The Adolescent Years

The prefrontal cortex of the brain isn’t fully developed for teenage boys or girls. But it matures faster in a teenage girl’s brain than a boy’s. As a result, boys are more easily distracted, less organized, and exercise poorer judgment.

There’s no shortage of references to young men’s fixation on sexual thoughts in puberty. But that’s not the only thing happening as the floodgates of testosterone open up. The hormone cocktail flowing through a boy’s body causes them to be even more mindful of their place in the social hierarchy, more territorial of their belongings, and more fixated with anything that might remotely feel like a challenge.²

Boys fixate on winning and competition. Victory occupies a significant portion of their daydreams.² Unlike women’s cyclical hormonal pattern, men’s testosterone levels rise and fall based on many different factors including age, time of day, and having children. Another factor that influences testosterone levels is competition. Testosterone levels don’t just rise or fall with physical competition. Watching their favorite team win or lose–or even watching their preferred presidential candidate win or lose–can alter a man’s testosterone level.³

I don’t blame you if it seems like you’re reading something from the Greek or Roman Empire. Social hierarchy? Turf-wars? Political strength as a measure of manhood? These ancient neural pathways have stood test of time. So how does this play out in the modern setting where boys will be at school for most of their waking hours?

The Male Brain at School

A boy’s strength and ability in playground and classroom competitions impact his social standing. Physical activity often forms the basis for competitions that help boys identify their place in the social hierarchy. A boy’s propensity for physical activity doesn’t stop at the playground doors. It extends to the classroom environment as well.

Movement is integral to learning for boys. They are more engaged in learning if they are moving. This is true for boys and girls. But boys are more likely to move by default and can’t seem to learn as well without it. Tapping their pencil on the desk, shaking their legs like a jackhammer, and squirming in their chair while their teacher talks are all activities that help boys learn.

Boys are less organized and messier than their female counterparts. This isn’t just a stereotype. Blame their later-maturing prefrontal cortex. Their workspaces, backpacks, and lockers might be a little messier. They may struggle with planning for multi-step projects. They’ll get bored and distracted more easily when life around them isn’t stimulating.

These are well-established assumptions about how the male brain works. So how does knowledge of these biological influences shape young men’s learning environments?

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Sterilized Playgrounds

As Lynnsee and I walk the playground, she has a horror story for every natural element visible to the naked eye. The tree roots emerging from the ground could be a tripping hazard. She knew of a child who prematurely lost their front tooth in just such an accident. The mulch in the rain garden would inevitably slice open up a sandaled foot. She recommends we prohibit sandals if we continue to use mulch on the playground.

When the little girls in Isaiah’s class saw the tree stumps arranged in a circular pattern, they saw a tea party waiting to happen. When Isaiah saw those same stumps, he saw a challenge to be conquered. But Lynnsee saw something different. She saw a crisis waiting to unfold. And she had a story for it too. Her head shook in disappointment as she told the sad tale of a four-year-old who fell while trying to jump from one stump to another. She would lament his little broken bones while she wrote on her clipboard. The stumps had to be removed before she would certify the preschool.

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Lynnsee is not a bad person. But she represents a system designed to limit risk, mitigate lawsuits, and efficiently manage herds of children. This system is full of well-intentioned, middle-class women with strong executive skills like Lynnsee. It is a system that prioritizes order, efficiency, and control over the messier version of childhood that biology–especially male biology–would otherwise produce.

The sterilization of playgrounds (and reduced time on the playground in general) hinders the exploratory play and physical activity that boys are more driven toward. The shift toward sterilized playgrounds like the one Lynnsee would have preferred has resulted in a shift in how children’s brains operate. Jonathan Haidt describes this process as moving from “discover mode” to “defend mode”. In one mode we learn. In the other, we worry. In his book The Anxious Generation, he makes a strong case that this shift is the precursor for the anxiety epidemic evident in college students today. Decreased unstructured outdoor play is hard for both little boys and little girls. But the consequences are worse for boys who are wired for competive, rough, gross motor play.⁴

Sterilized Classrooms

In efforts to create safe spaces for young children, we have not only sterilized playgrounds but also classrooms. We name emotionally harmful what might have historically been considered innately male. For example, in college, professors warn future educators about the use of competition in the classroom. I heard this firsthand. It creates winners and losers. If competition has any real consequence–keep it out of the classroom. Say that to Isaiah and his hamburger-eating friends who make everything a competition or challenge.

I know firsthand that some girls, myself included, are just as competitive as boys. But I’m not as worried about girls today. Society is making up for centuries of bad messaging to women. Between the “girls run the world” posters above the water fountains on-campus and women like Caitlin Clark setting viewership records, girls are getting the message that competition and drive are good. Boys, however, are sent very different signals. The only time they hear the word masculinity is when the word toxic precedes it. And competition is one of the chief characteristics of toxic masculinity.

When teachers replace competitive games such as those found at Kindergarten learning centers with lectures or other language-heavy classroom experiences, boys may literally fall asleep. Teenage girls don’t like these lectures any more than boys, but verbosity doesn’t send their brains into a narcoleptic state in the same way it does the average adolescent male brain.

Gender Mismatch Between Educators and Students

Lynnsee’s propensity to avoid risk has probably rarely been challenged. She works in a field that is overwhelmingly female. Almost 90% of elementary teachers and 65% of secondary teachers are female. I’ve hired teachers for the last decade. For every male applicant, I probably receive 25 female applications. I would probably hire a lot of women even if more men applied. Women bring a unique blend of experience, executive capacity, and care that is crucial to the elementary classroom. But the gender imbalance can create challenges if left unchecked.

Surely teachers wouldn’t treat little boys differently than little girls. Would they? Well, they might.

Even when boys and girls perform similarly on standardized tests, boys get worse grades on their report cards. In subjective measures of student performance, teachers are more generous to little girls and high-achieving boys who behave more like little girls. This starts as early as primary school. Students with higher GPAs tend to be the same students who are thriving academically at all levels. White girls stand at the top of the academic achievement mountain. And at the bottom, you’ll find little boys–particularly young men of color.

What’s the explanation? Well, boys possess traits that don’t always align with classrooms designed by women. Let’s take noise, for example. Most teachers have gone through a brain-altering experience of pregnancy that results in increased noise sensitivity. When you walk into many classrooms today, you’ll find a noise meter. It indicates the appropriate amount of noise in the room. Noise meters are based on an unproven assumption that learning is optimal in a quieter room. Most of the time, the “appropriate” level falls far below the natural state of the young men in the room.

I’m not saying boys shouldn’t learn the self-governance necessary to be part of a productive classroom. But our expectations should give a little weight to biological influence. Contrast the orderly, calm, model classrooms with the competitive drive and propensity for movement boys have. It’s easy to see how there might be conflict.

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What is the impact?

Lynnsee and people like her are working hard to create safe and healthy schools for kids like Isaiah. But there are greater threats than broken bones on a playground or losing in a classroom competition. The system unintentionally discourages risk-taking. It diminishes boys’ energy, drive, and motivation. If loud enough, the negative messaging might even cause them to withdraw. This might explain why so many young men pursue competition and acceptance in virtual environments.

Globally men are not doing as well as women. The disparity begins in preschool and persists through all levels of education. By the time they graduate high school, the path diverges even further. Boys are far less likely to enroll or graduate from college. This important milestone predicts future health, wealth, and many positive relational experiences.

In a traditional school setting, Isaiah will spend most of his day engaged in activities that utilize the less developed parts of his brain. His time spent doing things he enjoys will either be restricted or minimized. As a result, he won’t experience as much success. He’ll receive subtle and unintentional messaging that the way he’s wired is problematic.

In efforts to spurn discriminatory practices toward girls, our society has labeled toxic what might more appropriately be described as “driven”. In balance, these traits actually give young men a sense of purpose and motivation. It’s easy to understand why many young men feel innately unmotivated or even unworthy. To make matters even more confusing, some of these traits are validated in their female classmates but described as harmful in boys.

What then shall we do?

I’m not advocating we leave boys to their biological instincts and embrace a Lord of the Flies experience in our K-12 classrooms. But there are options between that and diagnosing the inability to sit still for 6 hours a day as a mental health condition or labeling competition-seeking behavior as bullying. Gender differences are biologically initiated and socially reinforced. These differences should never be used to excuse bad behavior or perpetuate discrimination. They should also not be pathologized or ignored.

At the height of the women’s rights movement in the ’70s, Jean Baker Miller wrote the book Toward a New Psychology of Women. In it, she claimed that traditionally feminine traits such as collaboration, generosity, and service were perceived as weaknesses since they were viewed through a male-biased lens. She challenged this perception. She argued these traits should be considered strengths in the workplace and in our homes.

In the last half-century, her challenge was accepted. These traits are now widely considered crucial to business interests. Women like me benefitted from a new worldview. When Dr. Miller wrote her book there was a significant gap between the number of men and women who earned a Bachelor’s degree. That gap closed the year I was born.

By 2019 that gap returned larger than it was in the ’70s. But this time, it pointed in the opposite direction. It’s now the boys who need our help. Traditional masculine traits are perceived with a negative bias: competition, risk, stoicism, achievement. We need a new psychology toward young men. This shouldn’t be a zero-sum game where our daughters must diminish for our sons to achieve or the other way around.

It’s time we rethink the lens through which we see our sons. Boys need space to mature their energy, drive, and passion. They need educational experiences that are relevant to their biological makeup. They need models who can help challenge them and show them how to respond when they win. We need to call them out of the shadows and into engagement, leadership, and achievement.

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Footnotes & Resources

These books provided a lot of the information from this article. As an Amazon Associate I make money from qualifying purchases which may include some of the links to the books below.

1. Of Boys and Men. 2022. Richard Reeves. This book provides a comprehensive overview of the evidence that men are not thriving right now.
2. Most of the research I’ve included here on the male brain comes from Dr. LouAnn Brizendine’s two fascinating books The Male Brain and The Female Brain. I highly recommend the The Female Brain.
3. Your Brain on Birth Control: How the Pill Changes Everything by Dr. Sarah Hill is an informative book about the role that sex hormones play in our lives and experiences. The focus of the book is the impact of hormonal birth control on… well pretty much everything.
4. Jonathan Haidt’s new book The Anxious Generation is an incredibly important book that I would recommend every parent with children under age 14 read today.

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